Random conversations or Our kids are weird

I can’t remember the context for this even though it just happened.

Sydney, to a sibling: Sucks to be you!

I must be trying to block it out.




In the car.

Elise: I wish I was borned cross-eyed.

Me: Why?

Elise: Because it’s not normal and I don’t like to be normal.

I don’t think you need to worry about that.




One of those so-excited-to-tell-you-I-can-hardly-stand-it stories.

McKenzie: I told my friends about how we saw a real live hobo on our vacation with the long hair and the beard and the shorts and the crazy shoes and socks (or was he barefoot?) and he was like digging through the garbage can, and they said, “You’re sooo lucky!”

Me: Why?

McKenzie: Because hobos are awesome!

Am I just old or something? I don't get it.




Bedtime.

Tyler: I’m going to go to the bathroom James Bond style!

Does a diving roll towards the bathroom and hits the wall.

Tyler, laying on the floor in the middle of the hall: Ow.

I just walked away.



In the car.

Elise: I feel like I have an extra toe.

Me: What?

Elise: It feels like there’s an extra toe on my foot.

Me: What are you talking about?

Elise: You know how your hand has a finger that comes out the side? I feel like there’s a toe like that on my foot.

A phantom thumb toe. No wonder she has a hard time with shoes and socks.





After dinner.

McKenzie: Can girls be hobos?

Me: Yeah.

McKenzie: Yes! I wanna be a hobo when I grow up!

Elise: I want to be a hobo when I grow up.

McKenzie: Why do you always have to copy people?

Again with the hobos. And the copying.





Any time.

Sydney: I need some chocolate milk to watch Tom & Jerry.

That’s pretty much all she says lately.




After a spaz-attack by one of the girls.

Tyler: Was I adopted?

Me: No.

Tyler: I had to have been adopted.

Me: Hey, if you were adopted that means you wouldn’t be related to me. Harumph.

Tyler: Well, then was everyone else adopted?

Me: Totally.

I tell them all the same thing—whatever they need to hear.



Bedtime again.

Tyler: Double-O Seven! Dive-rolls out of the family room.

Tyler, walking towards his bedroom: One time I OO7′d it into the bathroom, only I missed the door and hit the wall.

Me: That was last night. I was there.

Tyler: Oh yeah.

I’m not sure where this ”OO7′d it” phrase came from, but I’m kind of liking it.




Just random conversation.

Tyler: If they had an invention that would permanently take out wedgies, I would totally buy it.

Me: What?

Tyler: I’m serious. I’ve been getting a lot of wedgies lately. I don’t know what’s going on.

I don’t know what to say.